Posts Tagged figging

Overcoming Inhibitions

My post yesterday talked a bit about how difficult it must be for a would-be submissive living in a vanilla relationship to take the initiative to ask her partner to dominate her. After I wrote the post, I thought a little more about my relationship with Joy and how we got to where we are today. It occurred to me that while I started us on our current path, there have been occasions when Joy has, herself, taken the step of asking to be Dominated in some specific way. This isn’t precisely the same thing as starting out with a vanilla partner–Joy knows well that my tastes run to many flavors besides vanilla, and that I would be highly likely to agree to participate. Nonetheless, it’s related, as it requires her to admit to herself and (gulp!) even me that she wishes to submit in some unusual fashion.

Now, Joy definitely struggles with this. Actually, that’s one of the qualities that I find most endearing about her. Inside, she’s a wanton woman who wants and needs to be taken and used. But that inner trollop lies buried beneath layers of properness and inhibition, and because of this, she has a very difficult time confessing her needs to herself. Confessing them to anyone else, including me, takes “difficult” to a whole new level. Despite this, however, her desires are powerful, and there have been at least two instances when they’ve been able to conquer her sense of shame to allow her to express them.

In the first instance, Joy led us into the practice of “figging”. She knows what she likes–anything regarding anal play definitely attracts her attention. One day while doing some “research” on the internet, she came across an article about figging. Intrigued, she read everything she could find about it, and even went so far as to go to the store and purchase the required piece of raw ginger. There was no question in her mind that she wanted to give it a try. However, one enormous obstacle loomed…she had to let me know what she wanted.

The second instance was Joy’s desire to have a nightly maintenance spanking. We had engaged in sporadic spanking scenes for several months, and I had even set a requirement a month or two before that she must be spanked every night for a week. Once the week expired, however, we stopped, and Joy wanted more than that. She wanted to be spanked every night before bedtime. Again, though, she had to overcome her inhibitions to tell me this.

In each of these two examples, she eventually succeeded by following the same strategy. Remember, please, that the foe she struggled with in both cases was her own inner feelings of guilt and shame–she pretty much knew I’d be game for both of these options. Her strategy was to wait until late night pillow talk, after we’d had a wild night and her body was still singing from hormones and afterglow. Choosing this moment made sure her desires were at maximum power. We’d turned out the lights and were snuggled together like spoons, which helped because the darkness made her feel concealed and she didn’t have to face me when she made her “suggestion”. She reached behind her and placed her finger across my lips, non-verbally asking me to be quiet, and she spoke in a whisper. And she never really asked for what she wanted…instead it was more that she dropped a hint.

“I saw something on line that I think I might like,” she whispered so softly that I could hardly hear it. “It’s called ‘figging'”. She kept her finger across my lips to beg me not to respond. She knew she’d done enough with just this whispered comment, that she’d triggered the avalanche that would lead to the use of the ginger she’d purchased and now it would quickly gather momentum.

“You know when we did that week of spanking?” Joy asked in a voice like a mouse (sorry, mouse!). “Why did we stop?” Once more she knew the hint would prove sufficient to provoke the situation she desired.

In each case, Joy forced herself to go just far enough to fulfill her desire. She was able to do so by leveraging her body’s desires, minimizing the opportunity for embarrassment by hiding from herself as well as me, and by never blantantly expressing her need. In some cases, this might not be enough–if we were vanilla, for instance, I probably would have responded with, “Figging? What the heck is that?” However, in our own particular relationship, it worked.

My suspicion is that, while modification may be required to better suit individual circumstances, this approach might help others overcome similar situations as well.

Enjoy yourself,

Jake

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No, Not “Frigging”, I Said “Figging”

Joy is particularly fond of anal sex. Oh, it took her a little while to warm up to the idea, and we had to work into things fairly gradually (okay, it took a looooong time), but once the idea took hold with her, it took hold with a vengeance. I believe that it has become her single, favorite sex act, and the prospect of having her behind filled never fails to excite her. If you’re interested in her own thoughts on anal sex and her journey of discovery around it, she wrote a post on it awhile ago.

Never one to leave well enough along, I did some exploration around ways to enhance the anal sex experience. Of course, there are many options down this path, and we’ve tried quite a few. Anal plugs have been successful, for instance, and anal vibrators even more so. We’ve gone down the double-penetration route with success, and we’ve discovered several excellent anal lubricants. All of these strategies have paid dividends, and all have been incorporated into our toy chest for use in various late-night scenes and escapades. But a few months ago, Joy read something about “figging”.

For those who don’t know, figging actually traces its history back to horse-trading. In order to make an older horse appear more youthful and full of life and energy prior to selling it, an unscrupulous owner might place a piece of raw, peeled ginger root into the animal’s anus. Ginger is, of course, spicy, and this would cause the horse to lift its tail and prance about, fooling prospective buyers into thinking it was years younger than its true age.

You can guess where the story goes from here. Someone discovered that if one put the ginger in one’s own ass, rather than one’s horses’, the sensation was…intense. And to those who were into it, pleasurable. And slowly this became a known practice among those who are anally-inclined, and over time it has even grown to include other substances beyond ginger.

Joy was curious and one night, during a late-night session of pillow talk, mentioned it to me. I did my research to be certain it was safe (with ginger, it appears to be–other substances, not so much, so Joy and I are sticking with ginger) and several weeks ago we tried it.

Naturally I didn’t give Joy any advance notice that figging was on the evening’s agenda. Instead, I turned her over my knee, cuffed her hands behind her back, and gave her a sound, warm-up spanking. Before we began, I had placed a small bowl, the vegetable-peeler and a thoughtfully-chosen piece of ginger on the bed beside us, and then draped a towel over them to keep Joy in the dark about the planned activities. When the spanking finished and Joy was squirming in my lap, I told her to hold still, lifted off the towel, and then cut the skin from the ginger root with the peeler, using her bare back as a table and discarding the shavings in the bowl. I shaped the ginger root into the rough shape of an anal plug, pressed it to Joy’s dark rosebud, and slowly pushed it up and in.

Here are a few lessons learned about figging:

  1. No lubricant is necessary, and no lubricant is desirable. The ginger’s natural oils are sufficient to act as their own lubricant, and use of any other type will only interfere with the sensation.
  2. Pick a nice, thick piece of ginger root, and one that is at least three inches in length. The fresher, the better.
  3. Remove the skin completely with the peeler, smooth any rough spots and round off the tip if it’s too pointy.
  4. Use the peeler or a small knife to fashion a “collar” about two thirds down the length of the ginger. This will act as a spot for the anal ring to close around. Leave enough root beyond the collar to act in the same manner as the base of a butt plug and prevent the root from being pulled entirely into the ass.
  5. Don’t prepare the ginger too far in advance–it will lose potency after it is peeled. Wait until the last minute for maximum effect.
  6. Any activity that causes the ass muscles to clench will briefly heighten the effect. Spanking provides an excellent means of doing this.
  7. The effects stop quickly after the ginger is removed–we’ve had no issues with any lingering heat.

Since our initial foray into this area, we have tried figging twice more. The effect is quite astounding. Per Joy, it starts slowly but builds, feeling first warm and then hot. It forces her to relax, because non-relaxation clenches her butt, and increases the feeling of heat. The sensation is very intense, and she enjoys it very much. I have rarely seen Joy so turned on and so…pliable…as with her bottom nicely filled with a piece of raw ginger.

At the same time, the experience is so intense it’s probably best that we not repeat it overly frequently. Plus, it’s nice to have it in reserve for special occasions, when something really powerful is desired. That will definitely give Joy something to look forward to!

Enjoy yourself,

Jake

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