Posts Tagged bondage positions

Bondage Positions for Spanking

A couple days ago, My Bottom Smarts posted a list of the Top 20 Spanking Positions (and hat tip to Spanky for pointing me to it). Bonnie, the author, provides a description of each position as well as some pointers about pros and cons. It is a good list and an entertaining read, and it inspired me to consider the various spanking positions that we’ve used here at our place.

Now, my first, faltering steps down the path of BDSM came in the arena of bondage, and that’s still an area of considerable interest for both Joy and I. When Joy’s rear end needs a paddling, we often incorporate bondage into the experience to help heighten the sense of submission. Nothing ramps up the energy in a good spanking more than having one’s hands bound out of the way, so that they may not be interposed between paddle and tender bottom!

With that idea in mind, I thought it might make sense to create a list that combines both bondage and spanking—a sort of two-for-one special. However, as you may have picked up from previous posts, when it comes to bondage I tend to focus on the practical rather than the fancy and esoteric, so I by no means claim that my effort covers every possibility. There are many other options than those I’m going to discuss, I’m sure! The positions I have detailed below, however, are simple, sensible and useful, and Joy and I have found ourselves employing all of them at one time or another. With that understanding, following please find a brief examination of basic, practical bondage positions for spanking:

  1. Over the Knee, Hands Cuffed Behind the Back – Known by the acronym OTK, the classic Over The Knee spanking position is highly useful and highly erotic as well, especially if the spanking recipient’s hands are cuffed behind their back. Binding their hands removes their ability to use them for support and balance, so it’s best to take them over your knee somewhere that they will have plenty of built-in support–perhaps laying flat over your lap along the edge of a bed, for instance. While it’s true that, being cuffed behind them, the spank-ee’s hands remain in the vicinity of their hindquarters and could theoretically interfere in the spanking, in reality the spanker can easily hold them out of the way if necessary. From a psychological perspective, it’s more important that the partner being spanked does not have their hands to help them stand up, which greatly encourages a delicious sense of being in the spanker’s control.

    A couple added benefits of this position include that it is comfortable for both the spanker and the spank-ee (well…aside from the fact of the spanking itself, of course), and that the only required equpiment is a single pair of cuffs and a snap hook (in a pinch, an old necktie could substitute) to bind the wrists. Because of the close quarters, a short-handled spanking implement such as a hairbrush or paddle or the use of one’s bare hand is recommended. This is actually the favorite bondage spanking position here at Jake and Joy’s house.

  2. Leapfrog Position, Wrists Cuffed to Ankles – The leapfrog position is accomplished by placing the spanking recipient on hands and knees at the edge of a bed or on the floor, then drawing each wrist back between their legs and cuffing it to the corresponding ankle, left to left and right to right. Doing so places the bound partner’s body in a natural triangle, with their rear end in the air, ripe and ready for a paddle. The angle is excellent, and any sort of spanking implement from bare hand to belt to switch will work nicely. The only required equipment is a set of wrist and ankle cuffs, as well as snap hooks to connect them.

    The leapfrog position encourages a great feeling of helplessness, and because their hands are bound to their ankles, the spank-ee really cannot do anything to prevent the vigorous reddening of their rear end. However, remaining in this position can cause discomfort in a relatively short time, particularly in the neck and shoulders, so be considerate of your partner and keep the spanking relatively brief.

    Of course, another nice benefit is the ability to transition virtually immediately from flagellation to penetration, if this is your desire.

  3. Simple Ball Tie – This position is somewhat non-intuitive, but effective nonetheless. Lay your partner on their back and press their knees against their chest. Pull their arms around their legs and cuff them behind their knees, so that their body forms a ball. This effectively immobilizes your partner, and in a position in which their bottom remains highly exposed and vulnerable for spanking.

    Though any type of implement presents a viable spanking option with the ball-tie position, care must be taken to avoid missing one’s target and hitting other tender portions of the spank-ee’s anatomy (unless, of course, you actually intend to target those tender portions).

    The spanking recipient’s legs form a convenient handle with which to position their body for greater accuracy. Though the position is simple once you picture it in your mind, it feels quite severe to the bound party, as they have little ability to move, beyond rolling onto their side. Therefore, their sense of loss of control can be substantial. The only equipment requirement is a single pair of cuffs, and once again, it’s possible to cease spanking and move directly to intercourse with no change in position required. On the comfort scale, the basic ball tie rates somewhat better than the leapfrog.

    Joy hates this position, but I believe that’s mostly because we have mainly used it when discipline was called for.

  4. Hands Bound Overhead, Standing – Most often associated with whips and flogging, standing positions can work well for spanking also. Binding your partner’s hands to a hook overhead adds substantially to the experience, as once again the hands cannot be lowered to interfere and the bound party feels unable to escape the spanking as they cannot move away. Any type of implement works well for this position, as you can position yourself how you like to make best use of it.

    It’s possible to vary the intimacy of this position substantially based on how you position yourself in relation to your partner. For an impersonal feeling, stand behind them and apply a crop or switch to their bottom. For a more intimate flavor, stand in front of them, embrace, caress and kiss them, and reach around and use your bare hand on their behind.

    Comfort-wise, eventually it gets old having their hands above their head, but other than that, it’s not bad for the bound partner. The downside of this position, of course, is that it requires a hook in the ceiling to attach the cuffs to, and many people don’t have such an arrangement. If you do, however, this makes an excellent and versatile spanking option.

“What?” I can hear you say. “Only four positions?” As I said, I’m certain there are many others (and I can think of a fair number myself). However, these are the four bondage spanking positions that Joy and I really use on a fairly regular basis, which require no particularly specialized equipment, and which I would recommend incorporating into your own spanking repertoire, if they are not already included. None requires serious bondage expertise, and all are quick to set up and place your partner in. If you want to branch out beyond this, by all means do so! But I’d regard these four as the basic bondage spanking position building blocks to start with.

Enjoy yourself,

Jake

Tags: , , , ,

Bondage Positions: The Frog Tie

The frog tie gets its name from the position in which it holds the submissive partner’s legs when they are bound. Each leg is bent back at the knee and the ankle is bound to its corresponding thigh, creating a sort of bow-legged effect. Note that the frog tie is legs only–it does not occupy the upper body, and therefore another technique must be used (reverse prayer or over arm ties both come to mind, but there are other options as well) in combination with the frog tie if the entire body is meant to be restrained.

Picture of Frogtie thanks to Lorelei7 from English Wikipedia and Ookaboo!

The frog tie is more commonly used by rope afficionadoes, but may be accomplished with cuffs and snap hooks if desired. Simply place an ankle cuff on each ankle and a thigh cuff (being economy-minded, I generally use a large-breed dog collar as a thigh cuff, but you can purchase a purpose-built thigh cuff as well if you desire) on each thigh. Then use a pair of snap hooks to attach right ankle cuff to right thigh cuff and left ankle cuff to left thigh cuff. This will allow more slack than a tighter bond using a rope, but generally suffices.

The frog tie really isn’t my favorite position, but before we go into why, let’s quickly cover the plusses and minuses it provides. On the positive side…

  • It’s relatively simple to accomplish provided you have the necessary equipment.
  • It is not particularly threatening for beginners.
  • It limits your bound partner’s mobility quite nicely, and therefore adds a bit of feeling of helplessness to their experience.
  • Because the legs may still be freely spread, the frog tie leaves the genitals completely free for all types of play. Frontal entry intercourse (either anal or vagina) is unimpeded, and while rear-entry positions are somewhat awkward, they remain mostly possible.

And here are the negatives…

  • For cuff-and-chain guys like myself, the frog tie requires two sets of cuffs to implement (ankles and thighs), and still leaves the upper body completely unfettered.
  • Speaking of the upper body, what exactly are you going to do with it? The frog tie requires you to utilize some other form of bondage with your partner’s upper body or leave it free entirely.
  • Rear entry and access for spanking may be somewhat limited, though still available.
  • While it limits the bound partner’s mobility (i.e. they can’t walk and crawling is difficult), they retain substantial freedom to move their lower body. In particular, the frog tie does nothing to prevent them from closing their legs and limiting access to their genital area. This tends to make it feel far less constraining to the submissive than other, more severe positions.

For me, the big issue is the last one. While the frog tie looks somewhat confining, when you consider the heirarchy of bondage positions, it really falls rather low on the severity scale. When I want to ensure that Joy’s legs are bound, I have so many other, better options! Frankly, even the basic wrists-to-ankles position does a better job of keeping her legs spread, and it provides the added benefit of occupying her hands and arms as well. So the times where Joy and I employ this position are few and far between.

In general, the only time the frog tie comes into play here at our house is in conjunction with additional ties on Joy’s legs. For instance, if I marry the frog tie with a spreader bar to keep her legs apart or with additional ties to pull her knees out and apart, all of a sudden the confinement lives up to its severe appearance. However, generally there remain other, simpler options to get the same effect, so as I said, this position isn’t common for us.

On the other hand, if you’re trying to role-play a BDSM version of The Princess and the Frog, it could prove invaluable. So there’s always that.

Enjoy Yourself,

Jake

Tags: , , , , ,

Choosing a Bondage Position

I’m in the midst of planning my next adventure with Joy, an activity that always makes me tingle with anticipation. I wouldn’t go so far as to say that the planning is as good as the adventure itself, but imagining all the possibilities definitely provides its own thrill! I’m thinking that this time around we’re going to incorporate some flavor of bondage in our evening, but the question is, which flavor?

Choosing a bondage position (or in some cases, positions) can actually be somewhat challenging. The problem isn’t trying to think up a good one, but instead, trying to pick from all the various possibilities. Selecting the right one can sometimes prove crucial to the success of your evening, as many positions close off or at least inhibit possible activities. More than that, a bondage position in a scene can heavily influence the atmosphere you’re trying to create. Several different factors come into play as you narrow down your selection.

  1. Some positions simply may not be possible or practical in the scenario you envision. For instance, a standing position with hands pulled overhead isn’t possible if you don’t have an overhead connection point, an issue many people face in their homes. Or if you plan an outdoor scene, it may be difficult to use a spreadeagle position, as it requires four connection points, one for each limb (oh, sure, you could rig up a solution for this by the use of stakes driven into the ground, but then you must have stakes and a place where you can drive them). Usually the impossible and impractical options fall out rather quickly, leaving you with a smaller set of possibilities that require more careful consideration.
  2. What equipment do you have available? If the only thing you have is a pair of handcuffs, you can’t very well achieve an over arm tie or even wrists-to-ankles. You could, however, choose the obvious hands-behind-the-back, or a less-obvious primitive ball tie. Or, of course, you could improvise to supplement the equipment you have available. And what if you have a brand new piece of equipment you want to try out? What positions might be good to enable you to use it effectively?
  3. What positions fit in well with the activities you have planned? As an example, if you plan to penetrate your partner from behind, selecting a hog-tie option may not be the best choice, as it tends to make rear entry difficult. If you want to receive oral sex, the leapfrog position might not be a great choice, as it limits the bound partner’s use of their head and mouth. And if you want to flog your partner’s breasts, the ball tie position is a non-starter because it pulls your partner’s legs against their chest, restricting access to your tender targets.
  4. The mood of the adventure you want to create must be considered. If you want a slow, dreamy scene, with elements of romance and tenderness (and yes, these qualities can be combined with bondage), then you’ll wany a less severe position, such as spreadeagle on the bed or perhaps a wrists-to-ankles tie. On the other hand, if you want a feeling of strict control, then perhaps a more severe position, such as leapfrog or a hog-tie, might be in order.
  5. The duration of the bondage and your partner’s comfort must also be factored in. I get that sometimes discomfort might be a feature, rather than a bug, but even so, you need to think carefully about this. If you plan an activity that is going to take 30 minutes (don’t ask me what activity–that’s up to you), it would not be wise to use strappado as your position of choice. Your partner will become highly uncomfortable, is likely to safe word out, and will potentially suffer serious back issues if you place them in this position for such a long time! On the other hand, 30 minutes in a reasonable spreadeagle position, particularly on a soft surface, won’t be a problem. The bottom line on this is if you need for your partner to feel a bit of discomfort as part of the adventure, it’s okay to use an uncomfortable position, but be sure it’s brief or they will rapidly become unhappy with you (and not in a good way, either). If you desire a lengthy session, either change positions or pick something more comfortable to start with.

  6. If you’ve read this far, you might easily be telling yourself, “All of this is just common sense!” Of course that’s true, but even so, things can get complicated rather fast. It is all too common to envision a scene which creates conflict within the factors listed above. For instance, what if you want a lengthy scene with a severe feeling of control that features spanking your partner’s bottom. Well, “lengthy” argues for comfort, “severe” implies some potential for discomfort, and spanking on the bottom rules out several options that would possibly enable the first two criteria to be met (such as a relatively tight spreadeagle). What do you do then?

    Well, one option would be to simplify your scene and relax one of your goals. If you give up the “lengthy” portion of your plan, several options become available. Of course, that then means you can’t achieve everything you wanted to.

    A second idea would be to change positions mid-stream.

    Wait a minute! Changing positions sounds like a perfect solution! You can have your cake and eat it, too! In the scenario described above, for example, you can first place your partner in a strappado position and spank them soundly, and then move to another, more comforatble position for the rest of the scene. Smiles all around!

    Before you get overly enthused, however, be aware that changing horses midstream like this introduces problems of its own. Firstly, there’s the down-time as you change over. Excitement drains away like water out of a leaky bucket while you unsnap, unbuckle or untie. More than that, the fact that your partner cooperates with you to allow you to place them in another compromising position tends to ruin the illusion that they are helpless and in your power, both for you and for them. And finally, there’s simply the added complexity and the risk of something going wrong. Many times I have realized part way through a transition like this that I forgot to lay out an essential piece of equipment (a snap hook, the adjustable stocks, etc.), requiring me to rummage through drawers to locate it before we can move on.

    After many, many experiments, my rule of thumb these days is that one change of position during an adventure can be managed. More than one is a mistake. And no change at all is best. Avoid the temptation to solve all your problems by switching from position A to position B to position C–both you and your partner will regret it if you succumb to this temptation.

    Of course, the best option of all is to come up with the ideal position, the one that meets all your criteria. Of course, this isn’t always possible. In fact, such a position may not exist for what you have in mind. But often, if you consider carefully, you can manage this. For the scenario I laid out above, for instance, I’d consider placing Joy on our spanking table, head down, butt up. With her collar and knees bound to the table, and her hands cuffed behind her back, this position feels plenty severe, and yet remains relatively comfortable. And in addition, her ass is nicely exposed for the desired spanking.

    Hmmm…that gives me an idea…

    Enjoy yourself,

    Jake

    For posts discussing many of the various bondage positions mentioned above, you can see my entries under the “bondage positions” tag on this blog.

    Tags: , , , , ,

Bondage Position: Over Arm Tie

Many bondage positions are relatively obvious if you think about the human body and how it is constructed. Join the hands front or back, join the feet, extend each limb and tie it off…there are lots of immediately apparent options. The over arm tie, however, is less intuitive, and generally doesn’t come to mind when a beginning Dominant plans the scene-du-jour. That’s too bad–the over arm tie has many good points, and actually works well for beginners, both on the Dominant and submissive side.

To achieve an over arm tie, simply bind or cuff the submissive partner’s hands together in front of them, then draw them up over and behind their head and tie them off. Now, if you’re thinking this through, you’ve probably just asked, “Tie them off to what?” Good question, as there’s no obvious means of binding your partner’s hands behind their head. However, there are several different solutions to this problem.

  • First, if the bound partner is wearing a collar, you could turn it so that the O-ring is to the rear, and then fasten their hands to it. This works well, but take care that no possibility exists that your partner may choke.
  • Second, you could also make use of a bondage belt if you have one, and use a tie to fasten their hands to the rear of the belt in the small of their back.
  • Third, you could bend your partner’s legs up behind them and use a tie to fasten their bound hands to their ankles.
  • Finally, if you’re a bit more experienced, the over arm tie is the best way I’ve found to utilize an anal hook, such as the rope master, for bondage. Simply use a tie to secure your partner’s hands to the ring at the top of the hook in the small of their back, and you’ve got shockingly firm control of them.

Why would you want to use an over arm tie with your partner? Well, it presents a variety of benefits:

  • The over arm tie provides a great feeling of vulnerability to the bound partner. Their hands are up and back, leaving the entire front of their body exposed and defenseless.
  • Breasts and genitals are both offered for stimulation in this position, as well as less well known erogenous zones, such as the neck and underarms. In addition, the bound partner’s face and mouth are accessible for kisses or other, more serious uses.
  • Despite the feeling of vulnerability it provides, the over arm tie is remarkably comfortable for the bound partner (provided that it is not tied too tightly). They may lay either face up or face down without discomfort. Because of this, it makes a good position for beginners to try after they’ve experienced the standard hands-behind-the-back and wrists-to-ankles. Joy tells me that for her, the over arm tie is the most comfortable position in which to be bound for long time periods.
  • Because the over arm tie does not necessarily involve the legs, you are free to use them for other purposes, including additional bondage positions (a frog-tie, perhaps?), holding them apart with a spreader bar, or simply leaving them free to wrap around your hips when you enter your partner.
  • Speaking of entering your partner, the over arm tie offers excellent opportunities for intercourse, as the bound partner’s legs may be left free. Both anal and vaginal penetration are perfectly convenient, with entry possible from either the front or behind.
  • If desired, it is possible to ramp up the severity of this position by increasing the tension with which the arms are pulled back and bound. Just avoid using the collar as a connection point if you go this route, and be aware that the comfort of the over arm tie declines rapidly as the tightness increases.

Every position has its drawbacks, and the over arm tie is not immune:

  • Binding your partner in this way requires additional equipment beyond just cuffs and a snap hook. At a minimum, some sort of tie is required, and a collar or belt of some sort may also prove useful.
  • Though the over arm tie secures the bound partner’s hands and arms out of the way, it does not necessarily do the same for their legs. Because of this, it does not feel as restrictive as some other bondage positions.
  • If too much slack is provided in the tie off, it is possible for the bound partner to slip an arm back over their heads and escape the position. Long ago, in the days pre-Joy, my girlfriend at the time demonstrated this for me after we had just finished an adventure. She waited until it was over, so it didn’t spoil anything, but during the whole scene, she was aware that she could escape, which tended to greatly diminish her feeling of helplessness. Plus it was an embarrassing slip up for me!

I usually employ the over arm tie with Joy when I want her hands out of the way, but her legs free, or when I want unrestricted access to her breasts and underarms. Also, as mentioned above, a much more severe sense of confinement can be achieved combining the over arm tie with an anal hook, and that is highly effective when a strong sense of control and helplessness is desired. On the other hand, I generally wouldn’t use an over arm tie if I wanted Joy’s legs to be secured, especially if I wanted them bound apart for intercourse.

Enjoy Yourself!

Jake

Tags: , , , ,

Bondage Position: Spreadeagle

Spreadeagle is probably the most commonly known bondage position, and is the one most likely to come to mind when the word “bondage” is mentioned to a member of the vanilla world. The spreadeagle position is created when a person’s arms are stretched out apart and bound overhead and their legs spread apart and bound below, so that their body makes a big “X”. Note that spreadeagle implies they are lying face up—properly speaking, they would be “prone” rather than spreadeagle if they were lying face down.

It’s also possible to create a standing spreadeagle position, and in fact, the iconic St. Andrew’s Cross creates this exact configuration when an upright submissive’s limbs are bound to each arm of the cross. If you don’t have a St. Andrew’s Cross, however, you can make do with a wall and properly positioned connection points, or even a spreader bar or two.
.
Spreadeagle is popular for a reason, or rather, for several reasons. Here’s a quick overview of some of it’s good points:

  • Comfort: Unless the limbs are greatly stretched and pulled tight, the spreadeagle position is relatively comfortable for the bound party. Aside from the inability to scratch an itch, there’s no reason that they cannot remain in a spreadeagle position for the duration of a relatively lengthy adventure without issue.
  • Helplessness: With each limb pulled out and bound individually, there’s little that the submissive can do to interfere with activities planned by their Dominant half. About the most that can be done is to twist their body, roll their hips and toss their head. This describes to a tee Joy’s behavior when she is bound spreadeagle and in the throes of passion, and it makes for quite a vision. In general, I’d describe the spreadeagle position as deceptively strict, and the severity can be increased by removing slack in the connections at each limb.
  • Availability: Face, mouth, underarms, breasts, thighs and genitals are all exposed and available for many types of play, up to and including intercourse (though the angle’s not the best). Frankly, the whole front side of the bound party’s body is exposed, and you can take advantage of this in many ways. If you’re new to this and you want to try something a bit different, here’s a suggestion. Consider binding your submissive partner in this position and then (carefully!) shaving an interesting part of their body (if they’re not already shaved) or painting/drawing something special somewhere it won’t be seen by the general public.
  • Familiar: Because this position comes readily to mind, it usually isn’t perceived as exceptionally severe, and therefore can be a good one for beginners to try.

However, there are some notable drawbacks to the spreadeagle position as well. Here’s a quick summary:

  • Rear Access: While the front of the body is accessible, the back is not. Therefore, this position isn’t a good match for spanking (unless you’re using a non-traditional target) or anal sex. And while we’re on the subject of access, vaginal intercourse can be a bit challenging as well because of the awkward angle. Generally, when I Joy and I have finished playing our reindeer games in the spreadeagle and I want to reap my reward, I’ll free her legs so that she can lift them, which makes both types of sex eminently possible.
  • Familiar: Yes, I listed this as a benefit above, but it’s also a drawback. There can sometimes be a feeling of “been there, done that” about this position because it’s so common. If you’re experiencing this, give a standing spreadeagle a try. It’s different enough to add a little spice.
  • Equipment Requirements: You don’t need anything too complicated, but there is a fair amount of necessary equipment to use this position. You need something (cuffs or rope, perhaps) to attach to each limb, and it needs to be long enough to reach the required connection point. In and of itself, that’s not bad, really, but you also need the four connection points! Most beds can be made to work if sufficient ingenuity is applied, but if you’re not in the bedroom, it becomes a bit more difficult.

So when would you want to use the spreadeagle position? Joy generally finds herself spreadeagled on the bed when I want to play with the front of her body and make her feel helpless to prevent me. I’ve mentioned before that I enjoy giving her a series of orgasms until she begs me to stop, and this is an excellent position for that. A standing spreadeagle is much less common for us—we don’t really have a good setup for that.

I shy away from this position, however, for true intercourse, for spanking, or when I want to create a more severe mood. Far better options are offered by other positions for any of these activities.

Enjoy yourself!

Jake

Tags: , , , , ,