Archive for category Toys and Equipment

Stocking Stuffers

Uh, oh–I just looked up and realized that time is running out! Christmas is almost here! How did I not notice until now?

The good news is that I’ve done most of my shopping already, and I’m feeling pretty comfortable with the gifts I’ve purchased for Joy. The only thing that’s left is her Christmas stocking–the one hanging from the hearth in the living room. So far,it is alarmingly empty. Hmm…what could I find for her that I know she’d like, and that is small enough to fit into a stocking? Let me think…

Bondage Tape Aha! This will fit easily! And I have this idea of trying to bind Joy’s breasts with tape…because it is sticky it won’t slip off so easily in the throes of passion, or under the tender ministrations of the riding crop. Gifting this to Joy will let me enact my nefarious plan!

Locking Anal Plug – – Joy has always had a curious fascination with this item, and while it’s a bit pricey, it may be time for me to break down and get her one. Though I suspect she may discover that it is is one of those toys for which she has a love-hate relationship, I’m quite sure she’ll thank me for it…after all, I will be the one with the key!

Lube – – Come on, who doesn’t need more lube? I don’t think we’ve tried this kind, but how can the Swiss Navy be wrong? I think it would be good to give it a go, and it ought to fit into the stocking quite easily.

Vibrating Nipple Pads – – Just happened upon these, and I suspect Joy might find them intriguing. As far as I can tell, they are not any sort of clamp, but instead stick on like pasties. I’m a little concerned about the quality of manufacturing–we’ve had a bad experience with a different, vibrating nipple toy–but it might be fun, the price is right, and they’ll fit in the stocking.

Fluttering Kiss Dual Stimuation Hitachi Magic Wand Attachment – – We love our Hitachi Magic Wand (best tool ever for forcing Joy over the edge into orgasm), and the three or four attachments we have see frequent use. This one is different, though–it flutters, and is supposed to simulate the licking sensation of a tongue. Joy will have to give a full report out after Christmas to let y’all know what she thinks.

Leather Armbinder – – Okay, you’re right–this won’t fit in the stocking. But I’ve had a fantasy about binding Joy in one of these for years! Plus it’s leather, and you know how I feel about that. Picture Joy bound strappado-style with her arms raised behind her so that her bare breasts hang free. What kinds of wicked things could I subject her to? Just imagine!

Well, this list should help the stocking situation out rather nicely, don’t you think? Of course, Joy might bring up the idea that most of these gifts are really more for me than they are for her, but I think that’s just the Grinch talking. Don’t you?

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Product Review – Spiked Breast Binder with Nipple Hole

Thought I’d post a review of a piece of BDSM equipment that Joy and I have owned for several years. It’s out of character for Joy, as it is spiky and sharp, and Joy normally has serious issues with anything that might conceivably draw blood. However, she saw it online a few years back and sent me a link, and occasionally even I can catch a hint. I purchased it, and we’ve used it with a mixture of trepidation and excitement many times since.

It’s a breast binder, and it has a set of sharp tacks set inside it, so that the points press into Joy’s tender bosoms when I put it on her. From my point of view, however, the best feature is that it has holes to let her nipples poke through, so that I can play with them while she wears it!

If you (or your partner) might have interest, take a look at the full review for more information. Meanwhile, hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving!

Enjoy yourself,


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Friday Adventure Recipe (Saturday Edition) – Airtight

Recipe for Airtight

After my post on inflatables a couple weeks ago, I got a request for more information about how Joy and I use inflatable toys in our adventures. What better way to honor this request than to post an adventure recipe? I haven’t done one of these for awhile and may be a bit rusty on the format, but hopefully it will prove educational nonetheless.

For those who may not be aware, the word “airtight” has a specific meaning in the world of kinky sex. It means that all three, primary female orifices are filled at the same time. There is nothing subtle about this adventure. It is designed to first create a sense of helplessness in your partner, and then quickly and rather emphatically overload her pleasure circuits, to the point that she is utterly drained by the time it ends. For that reason, and because it requires the use of an anal plug that becomes more severe as it inflates, it is not suitable for beginners or those who have not experienced anal play.

“Airtight” has more complex equipment requirements than most of my previous recipe suggestions, but that’s because it’s specifically focused on the use of several inflatable toys. Be aware that inflatable gags become one of the small subset of gags that cannot be easily spit out when they are pumped up–therefore, they can present a safety hazard and care should be taken when using them. As always, I have written from the perspective of a male Dominant with a female submissive partner. However, you could easily modify this particular scene to fit a male sub, with the obvious difference being that males have only two orifices to fill.

You Will Need:

  • One inflatable gag
  • One inflatable dildo (vibration optional)
  • One inflatable anal plug (vibration optional), or you could use a second inflatable dildo if you prefer
  • One blindfold (optional)
  • One set of wrist cuffs
  • One set of ankle cuffs
  • Connection points to enable you to bind your partner spreadeagled on a bed or other comfortable surface
  • Four snap hooks
  • One vibrator suitable for clitoral stimulation (the more effective, the better–I suggest a Magic Wand style, but other types can also work)
  • Condoms (optional, but always recommended for use with inflatable dildos and plugs)


Cover the plug and dildo with a condom each before you start. You may find it best to put the condom over the entire dildo/plug rather than stopping at the base of the shaft. That way it won’t slip off. You may wear whatever you are comfortable in for this adventure. Your partner, however, should be nude before you begin. Though not strictly required, probably it’s best to keep your equipment under cover until you have placed the blindfold on your partner.

  1. Spend some time preheating your partner until she is nice and warm and relaxed. Place the cuffs on her wrists and ankles and buckle them snugly as you do so. Turn your partner over onto her belly and focus on her bottom. Remember, you will need your partner to be able to accommodate the uninflated anal plug, which even in it’s deflated state can be a little challenging without preparation. Rub and caress her behind to help her relax.
  2. Place the blindfold over your partner’s eyes.
  3. Lubricate your partner’s anus. Insert one of your fingers and move it gently in and out of her bottom. When she has become accustomed to a single finger, add a second, so that you are thrusting two fingers into her behind.
  4. When your two fingers are gliding easily in and out, take the anal plug, thoroughly lubricate it, and gently insert it into your partner’s bottom. Once it’s seated firmly in place, give it a single pump to ensure that it will remain in place.
  5. Insert the inflatable gag into your partner’s mouth. Buckle it tightly around her head.
  6. Turn your partner onto her back and place her in the center of the bed. Extend her arms and legs and attach each wrist and ankle cuff to a connector at the corner of the bed. Leave a little slack in the leg connections so that your partner’s knees can come up, but not nearly enough to allow her to close her legs. When you are done, your blindfolded and gagged partner should be bound spreadeagled on the bed, with her bottom plugged.
  7. Use your fingers and tongue to ensure that your partner’s vagina is well-lubricated. If necessary, apply additional lubricant. Then, insert the inflatable dildo and give it a couple pumps to help it stay in place. If it has a tendency to work its way out, you may need to hold it in with your hand.
  8. Now you have completed your preparation and the fun can begin in earnest. Tell your partner that you are going to make her body completely full, so full that she is airtight. Give each of the inflatables a single pump, and count it off, “One”. Apply the vibrator gently, softly, on low speed to her clitoris. Be careful that you do not bring her to orgasm this early in the adventure. After perhaps thirty seconds of clitoral stimulation, ask her if she feels full. Regardless of whether she indicates yes or no, tell her that she is “not full enough, not nearly full enough”. Judiciously keep the vibrator going a little longer, but again, do not let your partner come.
  9. Remove the vibrator, and then give the inflatables a second pump, each in turn. Count it off–“Two”. At this point there should be no problem–the inflatables are still fairly small–but watch your partner carefully just in case. If you observe any distress, deflate the offending toy immediately. Apply the vibrator again, and while doing so, tell her “Getting fuller…but you still have a long way to go before you’re as full as you can get”. Make sure she is well-and-truly excited before you stop this time, but once again, do not let her reach a climax.
  10. Keep going in this fashion–count off a pump for each of the inflatables, then apply the vibrator–until your partner approaches the capacity of her bodily orifices and she is truly frantic with desire and the need to come. Be smart and err on the side of caution–don’t go too many pumps, especially the first time you perform this adventure! Joy, who is experienced, maxes out at about six or seven pumps, but I’d suggest stopping at three the first time. “Now you’re nice and full, aren’t you? Now you’re airtight!”
  11. When you reach what you decide should be the final round, continue on with the vibrator. Tease your partner for a little while with it, and then begin to apply it more aggressively until you push her over the edge and into orgasm. If you’ve played out this adventure right, it ought to be a doozy. (Note: If your partner is multi-orgasmic, you could consider bringing her to orgasm in an earlier round, then continuing with the pump and vibe rotation until she comes again.)
  12. When she finishes her climax, deflate the dildo and the plug using the quick release valves, but leave the gag in place. Detach your partner’s legs from the connection points (leave her arms attached) and remove the plug and dildo. She should be extremely pliant and submissive after her experience with being “airtight”. Immediately roll her into a ball and take your pleasure in her. I suggest using her ass–it will very easily accommodate you at this point. If she can handle it, apply the vibrator again while you are inside her. See if you can make her come again while you thrust into her.
  13. Afterwards, deflate and remove the gag and release your partner’s arms. Hold her close and caress her. Let her know what a good girl she has been and how much she has pleased you.


You can choose other bondage positions besides spreadeagle for this adventure–just be sure that they make your partner helpless to resist. Good options might include a hogtie or a ball tie. Adding nipple clamps might also be an option and provide a tiny bit more stimulation. Whatever you decide to do, however, the key to this adventure is to give your partner just a little bit more than they believe they can handle (but not more than they can actually handle) so that their adrenaline kicks in and they truly cannot help but come.

Enjoy yourself,


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Fun with Inflatables

Sometimes Joy needs to feel full, you know? Oh, I don’t mean the “I just had a big meal” kind of full. I mean…full, as in her body has been well-and-truly filled. I know Joy often wants and needs to feel this way, and to a certain extent, for her it’s “the fuller, the better”.

I fill Joy in many different ways. Oh, there’s the obvious way, and I fill her that way as often as I can. However, no matter what I do, that particular method is only going to fill one orifice at a time, and it’s only going to fill her so full. Sometimes Joy needs to have her capacity tested. Sometimes she craves to take just as much as she feels she can handle, and perhaps a tad bit more. In these cases, it can be advantageous to fill more than one orifice at a time, and to fill them more completely than my built-in appendage is able.

The obvious means of doing so is through the use of one or more dildos. However, an issue that must be overcome when trying to accomplish truly filling one’s partner is that it requires one to expand the partner’s orifices beyond what they are accustomed to. Joy loves to take a big, hard penis in her mouth, in her vagina or in her behind, and all three of her openings have become accustomed to doing so. Truly filling her requires going beyond “big”, and that means a certain amount of stretching is required. Not only can this be painful if done too abruptly and/or without thorough preparation, but there’s an intimidation factor to deal with. In other words, it can be a little scary.

Now, perhaps you’re saying to yourself, “If it hurts and it’s frightening, maybe it’s too much. Maybe you shouldn’t do it!” But here’s the thing…when done correctly, tying Joy down so that she is helpless, filling her completely and utterly full–just beyond what she thinks she can handle–and then briefly but repeatedly applying a vibrator to the right spot leads to an escalating series of explosive orgasms, leaving her absolutely drained and quivering when we are done. Filling Joy completely full seems to overload her pleasure circuits, and the results are rather spectacular.

The trick is to do it right. Proceeding gradually is the key. Over time, I’ve discovered several ways to do this, and today I thought I’d discuss the simplest and easiest one. It relies on the power of inflation.

There are a large variety of inflatable products available through BDSM merchants. These include inflatable dildos, inflatable butt plugs, and inflatable gags. Some types even vibrate. They come with built-in hand pumps to fill them with air, as well as a quick release valve to enable rapid deflation when required. And all of them have one wonderful quality going for them–they start out relatively small, but gradually grow larger as they are inflated.

That quality is what makes them so effective at filling a partner fully. An inflatable anal plug doesn’t look especially large going in–it looks rather normal, actually. However, pump by pump, it grows inside Joy’s tight little bottom, each pump expanding her just that much more. After six or seven pumps, what started out as a normal plug has become something quite enormous, really, something that would have definitely intimidated Joy if it had started out that way. More than that, it achieved its size gradually, and especially if I wait for awhile between pumps to allow Joy’s bottom to get used to each increment of size, Joy can become truly full without pain.

Add in an inflatable dildo (which carries with it the same benefit) in her front entrance, and if I’m feeling a bit strict on a particular night, an inflatable gag in her mouth as well, with each one receiving its pump in turn and the vibrator playing it’s merry tune against Joy’s clitoris between rounds, and you can see how the evening will end on a high note.

If this idea appeals to you (or to your partner), I have a couple suggestions to consider when purchasing inflatable gear. First, consider vibrating options for either the plug, the dildo or both. We have a vibrating “Wonder Plug” that adds a whole new tingle to Joy’s experience when inserted. Second, for the anal plug in particular, be sure to get one with a solid core so that it remains relatively rigid going in. Plugs without a solid core are difficult to insert. And finally, I recommend using a condom over both the inflatable plug and dildo–it makes cleanup easier, as well as removing any possibility of the toys leaving behind a “rubber” taste on your partner’s private areas.

I’d also caution you to be a bit careful with inflatables. They truly can create an intense feeling of submission in your partner when used properly–after all, imagine something growing larger deep inside you, stretching and filling you more and more at the whim of your partner. You have no control–you have ceded it to your Dominant half, and you trust that they will know what is safe, what you can handle, and when they should stop. Now imagine that your Dominant half doesn’t know when to stop, or is overly enthusiastic and chooses to push things beyond your physical capacity. At a minimum, that experience would be terrifying, and it could truly lead to physical harm. My suggestion would be to err on the side of caution and gradually increase the number of pumps over several sessions as your partner and their body become more used to being “expanded”. Joy and I started out with four our first time, for instance.

Enjoy yourself,


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A Plug for a Close Friend

We possess quite an impressive BDSM equipment/toy arsenal here at Jake and Joy’s. We own all sorts of vibrators, a collection of dildos and harnesses, as well as plentiful paddles, floggers, straps and other tools for corporal punishment. Joy keeps a variety of interesting outfits in her drawers and closets, ranging from lace to leather to latex. I have an entire dresser devoted to housing hoods, cuffs, blindfolds, gags, chains, adjustable tie-downs and connectors, and in the back closet we keep the larger or less-commonly used items, such as the Liberator Wedge, the inflatable, bouncing ball with attached dildo, and our blow-up friend and sometime threesome companion, Sophia.

You know what I realized the other day, though? Out of all these various types of equipment, the single item that we have the largest quantity and variety of is the butt plug.

Let’s differentiate between a plug and an anal Dildo for a moment. When shopping online, the distinction I’m about to draw isn’t so clear—many items are sold as plugs when I would consider them dildos. But for me, a plug is designed to be inserted into and remain in the wearer’s bottom, whereas a dildo is designed to be inserted and either held in place or thrust in and out. If left unattended, the dildo will naturally fall out, while the plug left on its own should stay nestled firmly in place.

We have many different models of plug. Some are large and intimidating (though employed at the right moment, literally breathtaking in their effect). Others are designed for long-term wear, or made to fit inside at a specific angle. Some are shaped to duplicate a penis, whereas others are less literal. A few vibrate, one simulates a thrusting motion, and we even have a lovely glass model with a handle that is used to rotate the plug once it is inserted.

Each of these models has its own purpose, its own time and place for usage. Today, however, I thought I’d talk about the most frequent way we use a butt plug, and the benefits it provides.

One common instruction I give Joy in the evenings is to insert a plug. Sometimes I’ll text her this instruction as I leave work, so that she can have the plug in place before I get home. Sometimes I’ll wait until after dinner and tell her to go choose a favorite and bring it to me. When she does, I’ll require her to pull her panties down to her ankles, bend over my knee and raise her skirt, baring her bottom for me so that I can insert it myself. Occasionally we’ve even made it a requirement for a week or so for Joy to wear a plug every single night, and she has been expected to put it in herself as soon as she gets back to the house after work.

Once the plug has been inserted, she is to wear it for the rest of the evening, until I remove it when we go to bed. This is a requirement regardless of what we are doing—we may be going out to dinner, or to a movie, or simply staying home and relaxing in front of the TV. It doesn’t matter which of these activities our evening holds—the plug stays in.

So at this point, you may be asking yourself, “Why? What’s the purpose?” Well, as is often the case in BDSM, there are several different purposes to this single act. A Dominant may require their partner to wear a plug because…

  • It reinforces the Dominant/submissive aspect of their relationship. The Dominant is requiring their partner to insert an object into their anus, an act they likely wouldn’t decide to do on their own. The submissive is expected to comply with this requirement. If a certain amount of obeisance is necessary to comply, such as the sub removing their own panties and bending over to expose their bare bottom, the D/s dynamic is increased.
  • The physical act of wearing a plug can be exciting. Joy craves the feeling of having her bottom filled, and a medium-to-large plug fills her rather nicely. When well lubricated, the plug has a tendency to move slightly in Joy’s body as she moves, especially when she sits down or stands up.
  • The plug tends to focus the wearer’s thoughts on their body, their relationship, and their partner. Even a small plug is intrusive, and it calls attention to itself. Joy has sometimes worn one of her more comfortable plugs for as long as five or six hours at a stretch, and she informs me that it never lets her forget that it is there. When the submissive partner is constantly aware that the plug is in place, they have no choice but to be aware why it is there, what may happen when it is removed, and who is going to remove it.
  • Consistently wearing a plug stretches the wearer’s anal ring, enabling them to take larger objects into their rear end. When we first started experimenting with plugs, I was skeptical that this would prove true—I thought it was more of an urban legend than fact. However, there is no longer any doubt in my mind. When Joy “practices” in this way, she can accommodate something larger, and it is quite thrilling to her to feel her tight little rosebud stretch as it is penetrated by an object that truly fills her. Note that the accompanying legend, that the anal ring remains loose allowing for leakage and incontinence, has not proven true. I had long ago read that this worry was fiction rather than fact, and our experiences have confirmed this. Joy has had no issues with being “loose”, despite our frequent use of her behind.

Together, these four reasons are compelling, at least in our house, and they explain why we make such frequent use of plugs. If you would like to follow suit, here are some tips that I’ve learned over time to help make the experience more generally satisfying for both you and your partner.

  • Be aware that there is a limit to how long a plug may be tolerable for the wearer. When a submissive initially takes in a reasonably-sized plug, it may be slightly painful, but their bottom will quickly become accustomed to it, and it should begin to feel both exciting and comfortable inside. After awhile, however, the feeling will change from comfortable to tolerable (though hopefully the exciting will remain). And awhile after that, even tolerable will begin to fray around the edges and transition to painful. Generally, the larger the plug, the quicker this transition will take place. Plentiful, good quality lubrication helps extend the time limit, and practice can help extend the duration over time as well.

    Because of this, it’s a good idea to start short in duration and small in size, and gradually increase size and duration as desired. In addition, I suggest that you allow the wearer to have an option to bail out if necessary. Joy and I have an agreement that if the plug begins to hurt, she can ask to remove it.

  • Don’t start out with a large plug. If the plug you are using is too large for your partner, it will be difficult to insert, and if you try to force it, it will hurt when it goes in. You can even tear your partner’s anal ring if you go too far. Therefore, start small. Work up to larger plugs gradually. And be guided by your partner’s reactions. If they say it hurts too much, believe them and stop!

    Even when the wearer is practiced at taking an anal plug, it’s a good idea to start an evening with a smaller model, and if desired, transition to a larger plug a little later. Starting small allows the submissive’s ass to relax and become used to being plugged, thereby making accommodation of the larger plug easier. In addition, the brief respite as you transition from small to large can allow your partner’s anus to recover a bit, enabling them to once again enjoy the sensation as you insert something that thoroughly and deeply penetrates them.

  • A well-shaped plug has a larger shaft, but tapers to a narrower diameter as it approaches the base, then flares out again. The narrow diameter area allows the wearer’s anal ring to close tightly around it, while the larger shaft prevents the plug from slipping out by accident and the wide base serves to keep the plug from vanishing entirely inside the wearer’s ass. The shape of the base matters as well—bear in mind that the wearer will likely need to be able to sit comfortably with the plug in place.

    Some plugs, even though narrow at the base as described above, have a tendency to work their way out of the wearer’s bottom. If this proves to be the case, one good remedy is to require the submissive partner to wear thong panties. The strap of the thong will fit over the base of the plug, keeping it settled firmly into place.Both diameter and length matter when it comes to a plug, but diameter tends to be the more important measurement as long as the length is kept reasonable. A small plug may have a diameter as big around as a finger—large ones can be substantially bigger. The easiest plugs to insert tend to have a narrower tip—bear that in mind when just beginning.

  • The lubrication really matters. Use good quality lubricant, and plenty of it. I suggest rubbing it all over the plug as well as using a finger to insert some inside the wearer’s ass hole before insertion. In my opinion, the single best anal lubricant is Crisco—it provides excellent lubrication and lasts a good long while. However, if the submissive is female, be careful that none get into hervagina—it can lead to infection.

    If you prefer to go with a product specifically made for anal use, there are many options to choose from. After some experimentation, Joy and I tend to stay away from the ones that provide extra stimulation (either “warming” or “cooling”) and instead focus on those that provide good, long-lasting slipperiness. Though water-based products can be excellent for traditional anal sex, they often don’t last very well—I’d suggest going a different direction for plugging.

It’s always a good idea to make the process of plug removal even more fun than insertion. Wearing a plug is great preparation for full-on anal sex—the wearer’s bottom is already relaxed and ready to be taken. However, any other sex acts can work as well, and they can be combined with other activities (spanking, perhaps, since we’re already centered on the submissive’s behind?) that you both find exciting. Whatever you choose, providing some thrills when it’s time for the plug to come out ensures that your partner will look forward to it the next time you instruct them to put the plug in…

Enjoy yourself,


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