Recipe for Thorns and Roses

Roses and Thorns is an old idea, but a good one. It derives its power from juxtaposing romance and tenderness with harshness and cruelty, just as a rose juxtaposes its beautiful blooms beside sharp thorns. In the first Friday adventure post I did, I mentioned that I felt that there are really two types of adventure—action adventures and mood adventures. Roses and Thorns definitely falls into the mood category. Because of this, it lends itself to many, many variations—as long as you set up an expectation of tenderness within your partner and then foil that expectation with harsh treatment, you have created a Roses and Thorns scenario. With that in mind, the actions I lay out below should be considered only suggestions, and you can modify them however you see fit within the general framework.

As usual, this scenario is portrayed from the point of view of a male Dominant with a female partner, but genders and roles may be freely swapped if necessary to fit your relationship with little impact to the adventure. Ensure you have a safe word in place before you begin.

You Will Need:

  • Scented Candles
  • Lotion, cream or massage oil
  • Romantic music (your choice)
  • A spanking implement (could be a paddle, a crop, or even just your hand)
  • One pair wrist cuffs
  • One pair ankle cuffs
  • Two snap hooks

Note: A romantic theme for your partner’s attire is appropriate—think innocence and white lace and you’ll be headed in the right direction. Place all ingredients listed above after “romantic music” in close proximity, but out of sight until an appropriate point in the adventure to avoid interference with the mood you are creating.

  1. Light the candles, turn on the music, and lay out the lotions and oils, then invite your partner to join you.
  2. Focus on setting a romantic mood. Whisper sweet nothings in your partner’s ear, nibble her neck, exchange soft kisses. Take your time and strive to create a feeling of relaxation and tenderness.
  3. Rub your partner’s hands using hand cream, and when you’re done, use foot lotion and rub your partner’s feet. Build up passion with caresses and petting along the way, but give no hint of anything that is not vanilla romance.
  4. Ask your partner to roll over to lay face down, and then rub her back. Use massage oil if you have it. Straddle her thighs so that you have a good angle and work her back muscles until she feels very relaxed. Tell her how soft her skin is and how lovely she looks.
  5. Now comes the first jarring note. Using your weight to help her feel unable to move, grasp her hands and draw them behind her to the small of her back. Hold them there as you cuff them and use a snap hook to connect the cuffs behind her.
  6. Climb off your partner and bare her bottom. If she’s wearing panties, remove them. If she’s wearing some sort of nightgown, pull her skirt up over her waist. Caress her ass and upper thighs softly and tenderly.
  7. Using your hand or whatever spanking implement you choose, give your partner a thorough paddling. You want this to contrast markedly with the feeling of tenderness you created earlier, so now is not the time to be gentle. You should approach the edge of your partner’s comfort zone with spanking, but as always, be sensitive so that you don’t go too far.
  8. When your partner is fully exercised and gasping, stop the spanking, pull her to you and let her calm down in your arms. Administer kisses and caresses as appropriate. When she has relaxed a bit, buckle the ankle cuffs to her ankles, then remove the snap hook from the wrist cuffs behind her back so that you can pull her arms to the front. Attach each wrist cuff to the corresponding ankle cuff (right wrist to right ankle, left wrist to left ankle) in the wrists to ankles position.
  9. Position your partner on her back. The cuffs she wears will tend to keep her legs naturally parted. Kiss her tenderly on the lips, caress her body, kiss her breasts and nipples, dip your head between her legs and lick her pussy. You are striving to recreate the feeling of tenderness you destroyed with the spanking only a few moments ago.
  10. When your partner is highly excited and responsive, move up to her head. Grasp her hair with one hand and pull her to your penis. Make her suck it. At the same time, use your other hand to spank her between her legs, on her vulva (remember the vulva is a highly sensitive area and don’t spank her to hard!). Let her know you expect her to be a good girl and take your cock nice and deep.

You may finish this scenario however you choose—in your partner’s mouth if that is your preference, or you can change positions and finish between her legs or her cheeks. Select whichever option appeals to you.


As I said above, the variations on this theme are countless. The fun comes from confounding your partner’s expectations—just when you have her expecting tender, you give her harsh, and vice versa. This, of course, emphasizes that you may choose to treat her however you wish to, and what she wants or expects won’t be a factor in the decision.

Enjoy yourself,


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